When there is a group of friends or family members together I usually have a moment where I stop and notice how beautiful it is that we all managed to be in the same place and share that time together. That’s the nice thing about pictures, especially a group picture, it captures that moment.
I have two pictures like that, that serve as bookends, or perhaps a better description would be a book cover because the first picture was a special moment that for me signifies my initiation into this group. Not too long after taking this picture everything fell apart and we reorganized into separate subgroups who occasionally interacted and went on like this for close to a year. The second picture marks the end of this episode, with all of us adjusting to the changes that occurred this year.
We were kept apart by individual cases within the group of not being treated the way we wanted and by our own insecurities. And then yesterday it all came together again. I am not sure exactly what invisible forces ironed out all of the wrinkles behind the scenes that brought us together but it made me very happy.
I have experienced this before. It’s strange when something happens and you stop seeing your closest friends. Most of the times I knew the actual incident that caused the rift was not worth breaking up a friendship. I think what it is really happening is people have been slowly realizing they are changing and don’t have the same things in common. Perhaps we need space to deal with certain issues and we just don’t have the time or energy for anything else.
I have been fortunate that all of the significant people I have lost have returned to my life. Sometimes years go by before it occurs, and sometimes it happens more than once, but those invisible forces are at work and bring us back together.
Giving each other space allows us to make new friends and try new things. It gives us a chance to work on ouselves if we take the time to reflect on our part in the events. Maybe I’m not being treated the way I want, but where is the other person coming from? Did I treat them fairly? And if they didn’t treat me fairly, is it worth carrying the resentment still? Are my own insecurities keeping me from what I really want? Is there a way to just relax and appreciate whatever is happening now, even if it’s not part of my plan?
These are good questions to consider. Perhaps there is a way to correct things before everyone decides it’s best to walk away. And sometimes you try but eventually you can’t do anything else and you do have to walk away. Regardless, I truly believe the important people find their way back. I have the picture to prove it.